I'm done with mail servers

I can’t do this, anymore, man. I just can’t host my own mail anymore. It’s too much trouble. I train SpamAssassin every two weeks, but then there’s more spam! SPAM SPAM SPAM. My IP gets blacklisted, I unblock it, it gets blacklisted again, I unblock it again, EVERY DAY.

I can’t take this anymore, man. To hell with self-hosted privacy. Screw control, whatever that means. I’d rather have no mail than this pathetic life of maintenance to a mail server.

I’m losing my hair, I’m quite sure. I can feel it thinning, slowly receding in twin points towards the back of my head.

I can’t do this. I CAN’T DO THIS. Google, you can have my mail.